(received via email from reader Nita Rene)
If you are ready for the adventure of a lifetime, TRY THIS:
Enter Mexico illegally. Never mind immigration quotas, visas, international law, or any of that nonsense. Once there, demand that the local government provide free medical care for you and your entire family. Demand bilingual nurses and doctors. Demand free bilingual local government forms, bulletins, etc. Procreate abundantly.
Deflect any criticism of this allegedly irresponsible reproductive behavior with, “It is a cultural American thing. You wouldn’t understand, pal.”
Keep your American identity strong. Fly Old Glory from your rooftop, or proudly display it in your front window or on your car bumper.
Speak only English at home and in public and insist that your children do likewise. Demand classes on American culture in the Mexican school system.
Demand a local Mexican driver license. This will afford other legal rights and will go far to legitimize your unauthorized, illegal, presence in Mexico. Drive around with no liability insurance and ignore local traffic laws.
Insist that local Mexican law enforcement teach English to all its officers.
Good luck! You’ll be demanding for the rest of time or soon be dead…
Because it will never happen…
It will not happen in Mexico or any other country in the world except right here in the United States…
…land of the naive and stupid, idiotic political correctness.
Viva los gringos!